Watch this wedding processional… it received over 1 million hits on youtube when I watched it on Friday. Now, it has received over 8 million hits. It is most likely something you have never seen at a wedding.
This video is also here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4-94JhLEiN0&feature=player_embedded
Most people would watch this video and point out that this is a creative and joyful way to have a wedding processional. The Washington Post has written an article discussing this video. Some Christians might believe that this wedding processional is a mockery of the wedding ceremony. In an age where marriage is being redefined by culture, this video does not seem outrageous. I am conflicted about this wedding video. Let me explain.
Dance has been a universal act of joy in almost every culture through the ages. King David danced before God with all his might in joyful celebration when the Ark of the Covenant was brought into the assembly of Israel in 2 Samuel. Obviously, David did not dance with sunglasses on. Thus, these two dances are different. The dancing done in the video was well planned. This wedding party was expressing their joy of two people in marriage.
BUT, the song choice, sunglasses, and clearly comical overtones of the dance make me feel a little uncomfortable. As a pastor, would I allow this to take place in my church? The way each person of the wedding party comes down the isle is more about their dance being the center of attention rather than the marriage being the center of attention. Suddenly, the object of our attention is not the holy matrimony of two people. The reason why this video has received such a large response from people is because our rituals of weddings do not usually include such informal processionals. There is a reason why this type of thing is not common place. We, in our culture, have divided the areas of celebration into formal and informal. So maybe, this is an issue of religious culture vs. current culture clashing.
The conflict arises in me because I am a contemporary living and believing in an ancient faith. How do we balance our current setting with ancient values? The values are universal, but they present in different ways. I have never been a fan of the “we do ___________(fill in the blank) because we have always done it this way” mentality. There is nothing in scripture that guides the wedding ceremony, except that the joining of a man and women is a holy union in the community of faith in God: two become one. Anything that can detract from this event should be removed.
In the end, I believe that separating the attention away from the act of marriage by dancing down the isle in comedic fashion is something that detracts from the marriage ceremony. How many people think about the dancing processional when they remember a wedding ceremony instead of the exchange of vows? This is why we are seeing a break up of the institution of marriage. People are redefining what is important in a marriage. This dance would be a great dance for the wedding reception. People do not believe in the seriousness of committing your life to another or, they have not asked the most important question before they become engaged: Can I stay with this person through it all?
In the end, my commentary on this video is really about how our perceptions of marriage are changing. I think it can be a fun and holy event when couples incorporate meaningful acts of celebration in a marriage ceremony. Although, when those meaningful acts take away from the focus of the ceremony they cease from adding to the holy moment and begin to detract from the holy moment.
8 Comments
Your well-taken commentary leads me to think we in the church should rethink and recapture weddings instead of permitting them to be taken over by photographers, wedding planners, mothers, bridezillas, and just plain convention. The dances down the aisle are, as you say, intended in part to draw attention to the participants rather than to God. But they are not essentially different from gaping at the elaborate wedding dress, the bridesmaids’ gowns, or — everybody’s favorite moment — the flower girl and the ringbearer. How many times I have had to shoo away photographers who did not even respect a time of prayer! And, converting from pastor to organist for a moment, how often church musicians have had to respond to requests for music that is at bottom erotic!
So maybe instead of aisles and costumes and dances (the processional is just a sedate form of dance) we should set it all aside and think instead of how we can create a wedding tradition that is spiritual, simple, and contemporary.
I’ve set the problem. You go and solve it, Alan!
True, weddings have been taken over and I think weddings can be won back by the free church tradition with those churches rediscovering the liturgy of the rite. We free churches have thrown out the “ceremony” for fear it is “too Catholic”. Putting a stronger theology on worship will benefit churches trying to recapture the spiritual, simple, and yet still be contemporary.
As for the processional, the historic church and ancient Jews used processional as the entrance when worship begun or when there was a formal ceremony to show respect or thanksgiving towards God. So biblically and theologically, the processional is important part of the beginning of the wedding. You rightly point out we need to be mindful how much attention we draw to ourselves by ornamentation and how we should be giving the attention towards God.
Alan – I loved this video, but I feel the same way you do, in that it is more appropriate to the introduction of the wedding party at the reception. What fun! I loved how the groom came to meet her half-way down the aisle and they proceeded to the altar together. There’s a metaphor for marriage.
I appreciate your comments. I’m not sure how I would deal with this senerio in my church.
But, I have to say I liked the dance and we shouldn’t be too hard on this couple.
I think it created an energy and excitement about the wedding and the upcoming marriage that so many weddings are lacking.
If I were the pastor of this ceremony, it would then be my job to bring in the words of the liturgy to the serious tone of the commitment they were about to make.
I think we need to see the rest of the wedding (but we can’t) before we judge.
We should take off all our clothes and dance. David did it. 😉
The line between drawing attention to ourselves or to God can be very thin. Agreed. I would have allowed the procession, I think.
I have mixed thoughts on your commentary. I agree, this is a distasteful approach to worship God in the celebration of a marriage. However, drawing lines in the sand as to what is acceptable and what is repulsive are blurry at best. For instance; why wear expensive ornate dresses and tuxedos; why pay $3000 for flower arrangements; how about the cultural requirement of an engagement ring? None of these items have any place in the worship of God, and mostly have a great deal to do with self-indulgence. I’m not necessarily saying we throw the baby out with the wash, but reforming tradition mandates we examine many aspects of the cultic practice of marriage. I agree with most of the statements you’ve made and I appreciate your sober and prudent response to what the rest of the world embraces and celebrates. I think it is time the pastoral leadership in our generation takes back the sanctuary and the time and hour of worship. After all, we’re called by God to lead and feed His sheep. Part of shepherding is correcting and I agree correction is needed. However, the line becomes fuzzy as to what is acceptable and what is mockery. This is the area where critique is somewhat painful, yet overwhelmingly necessary. The procession would not happen on my watch. You’re idea of the reception is far more acceptable; although, still a bit over the top. Thanks for your thoughts.
Sorry your idea is not over the top, the idea of the dance itself is over the top in my opinion.
I agree Mark. Weddings are notorious to be more about the dress, flowers, and reception. The cultural requirement of a ring is changing. I married a couple that spent $200 on their rings, which is a symbol of their covenant. I am truly conflicted with this video. The couple obviously want their wedding to be fun, but I wish they exorcised a little more taste. True, we see the secular and the sacred over lapping so often in weddings. My goal of the post was to make people think about the video in the context of the changing acceptance of what marriage is and is not. From the comments, it looks like people’s gears are turning.