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How to stop, pray, and respond to Dallas shooting

The gun violence this week is unbelievable. Unnecessary killings. Alton Sterling. Philando Castile. Many more unreported shootings. And now, 5 Dallas law enforcement officers are dead and 7 more injured. As Black Lives Matter protesters and others were peacefully gathering in Dallas and other cities around the country, an individual (or individuals) decided to take wrongful action with gun violence. The main target? White police officers.

Our police officers need our prayers. Victims of this violent crime need our prayers. However, not everyone shares such thoughtful compassion.

In time of violence, trauma, racial tension, and death, I’m shocked and appalled at some of the responses – the insensitive responses. One such response comes from radio host and former U.S. Congressman Joe Walsh who tweeted: Continue Reading…

blog, Christianity

Social media reactions to the Orlando shooting

As I watched the news of the Orlando shooting unfold on television, CNN interviewed a man who came to the scene to try to find his friends. Although it was painful to watch, the man said something that struck me. He said, “Just pray for us.” Here is a man, who identified himself to be a member of the LGBTQ community, asking for prayer.

What followed in response to the Orlando shooting on social media was a mixture of thoughts and prayers, internet memes, statements on guns, and statements on the LGBTQ community. Most social media posts on Facebook and Twitter was supportive, positive, and hopeful. However, many were hateful, negative, and very abusive. Some Christians expressed anger at the mention of banning of assault weapons. Some even blamed the whole Orlando shooting solely on LGBTQ community. Many of the conversations online devolved into hate filled expressions of rage.

When faced with tragedy, especially with such politically sensitive topics of gay rights and gun ownership, most attempts to have a serious conversation online about cultural problems tend to result in defensive positioning. I’m not referring to posting a prayer or a message of support. I’m referring to online interactions that are insensitive or tone deaf to the pain and suffering experienced in tragedy, such as the Orlando shooting.

Our response should include support, prayer, and positive action. However, not everyone agrees. Here’s some of the best and worst I’ve seen online (all comments were publically viewable at the time of posting):
Continue Reading…

Christianity

10 most painful comments as a pastor

I was recently surprised when leaders in my current church told me that they wanted to celebrate the 10th anniversary of my ordination. 10 years? Has it been 10 years of full-time ordained ministry as a pastor? I am very thankful that my congregation that I serve took the time to mark the occasion. As I mentioned in my book, The Work of the Associate Pastor, churches help the longevity of their pastor with recognition such as of years of service or ordination anniversaries. Before I was ordained, I spent an additional 8 years in part-time ministry throughout college and seminary. A total of 18 years of ministry in congregations (including a stint in college campus ministry). Where has the time gone?

In the midst of helping and caring for hundreds or thousands of people, you can’t please everyone. Especially when pastors work within change and renewal, we sometimes are at the blunt end of verbal contempt. In addition, we make mistakes. We are just as human as anyone else. We try our best to reconcile. When people are misinformed, we pastors try be sensitive to those who do not have all the information.

As I look in 10 years of ministry at my previous churches, here are the most painful comments directed to me (not in any order):

Millennials

Stop saying Millennials are lazy

“Millennials? They live at home with their parents!”

“When I was their age, I had a job, spouse, and a car!”

“Young people today… these Millennials are just lazy.”

Those are comments I have heard in coffee shops, restaurants, and surprisingly in churches. Many of the people making such comments are Baby Boomers, who are known for experiencing historical gains in post-war job growth and increased standard of living. Frankly, it is disturbing for me as a young adult to hear such comments. As a younger Generation Xer or older Millennial pastor (depending on how you measure the generations) it is extremely vexing to hear negative comments about young people.

Associate Pastor

Associate pastor demoted to church plant

Since writing my book, The Work of The Associate Pastor (Judson Press), I’ve come to two realizations. First, I found that there are very few articles, resources or blogs devoted to my book topic. Second, writing on leadership, ministry, and associate pastor work while trying to inject humor is challenging. I’m just not that humorous when compared to such greats as Unvirtuous Abbey.

However, I found this gem over at The Babylon Bee, the trusted source in Christian news, brings us this sad sack tale of a lonely associate pastor. Enjoy:

Ash Wednesday, Lent

Pastors need Lent too

Just as we had finished imposing ashes on the foreheads of worshipers to begin Lent, my friend and fellow pastor David Bennett turned to me and said, “Alan, remember you are dust and to dust you shall return.” And with those words, David marked me with the sign of the cross with ashes. And that is when it hit me: It’s Lent. Forty plus days of Lenten lunches, Wednesday Bible studies, prayer services, extra time needed to plan extra sermons, meetings, and everything that comes with an already very full plate of ministry. Another year. Another Lent. Will I survive?

On Ash Wednesday, pastors get their hands dirty to impart ashes on the foreheads of parishioners with the words, “Remember that you are dust and to dust you shall return.” Millions of Christians attending services will hear those familiar words and then go home without realizing what is about to take place for their clergy. Ash Wednesday not only marks the beginning of Lent, but also the beginning of a trying time for pastors.

During Lent the church calendar fills up and the pastor’s daily agenda quickly gets full. Pastors and ministry leaders try hard to plan and lead meaningful spiritual encounters. Lent is a time of reflection and examination of our faith. People tend to start visiting their pastors with challenges, problems, concerns, and other needs. Somehow it seems people become more needy during Lent. I mean that in the best possible way. Pastors are called to serve and help people. We are glad to fulfill our calling. However, during Lent, pastors often find that demand for their service increases. People go into the hospital, someone dies, another has a crisis, and a transient is in the pastor’s looking for money but you are late for a meeting. Most pastors know the increased flow of need is coming, but that does not mean your pastor is ready for it. Continue Reading…

Christianity

The myth of the elite young athlete

I recently received an email from my brother-in-law that contained several video links.

“Tell me what you think.” My brother-in-law wrote.

I clicked and opened each link and watched my 8-year-old nephew goaltending a lacrosse goal. The video contained the coach’s commentary, superimposed video drawings, and slow motion point-by-point breakdown of his form.

“Wow! When I played that type of analysis and video work was only on ESPN,” I wrote back. I was shocked at the level of sophistication of the coaching analysis.

In the last 10-15 years, there has been an explosion in youth sports training, travel teams, artificial turf fields, video production, websites, private coaches, and “elite” sports teams. According to the news channel CNBC, youth sport travel is a $7 billion dollar industry. With the recent interest in forming “elite” youth athletes, parents are left paying for additional training and sacrificing family time to “elite” sports.

Growing up in the 1980’s and 1990’s, we kids played football, lacrosse, soccer, baseball, street hockey, and basketball. Some of us were on recreation teams and others were not. We tried all sorts of sports and leagues. We played because it was fun.

Now, as a father of three children, I cannot believe how much youth sports culture has changed. What was once a time of fun, team building, and exercise is now a billion dollar industry. Families spend the whole weekend carting around their kids to sport games or leagues. They spend 2-4 nights a week at practices. Their kid’s sports are their life.

It is not supposed to be this way.

blog

Time for a new adventure

I have some big news to share… well, it’s not “big” as in world changing, but big to me. After three years of searching, praying, and considering, I decided to go on a new adventure.

drum roll please

I’ve applied and was accepted into the Doctor of Theology program at La Salle University in Philadelphia, PA!

Church Leadership

Do you have church money anxiety?

In congregational life, there are always those who give more /worry more/spend more time on the money than others. In systems theory this is called overfunctioning. Members who are overfunctioning with financial aspects of the church always think if others gave more or were more responsible, the church wouldn’t have this problem.

Yet there’s a balance between those who overfunction and those who underfunction in terms of financial responsibility. It takes both to keep this dynamic going. Often key church leaders carry the anxiety for church finances.

Who is staying awake at night? Typically, it’s the pastor, although sometimes lay leaders are more worried than the clergy. I talked recently with a church treasurer who was losing sleep night after night over whether there would be enough church money in the account to pay the bills. In this situation, the potential shortfall did not belong to the treasurer but to the church. It wasn’t his responsibility—or not his alone. Yet he was the one who was holding all the anxiety for it.

blog, Christianity

Robin Williams and the church

As most everyone has heard, Robin Williams died on Tuesday from an apparent suicide. The reaction on Facebook and Twitter was one of shock. How could someone who brought so much joy and humor to the world be so troubled? Robin Williams brought us a diversity of characters in his movies and television shows.

I remember as a child watching reruns of “Mork and Mindy” and wondering, “Who is this guy? He’s so funny!” His films such as “Good Morning, Vietnam”, “Good Will Hunting”, “Mrs. Doubtfire”, and “Hook” are now classics running regularly on TV. His long filmography on IMDb yields several scrolls from the mouse. As reports surfaced of his drug and alcohol abuse, we began to learn of a troubled man. Robin Williams apparent depression most likely led him down the path of suicide.

Unfortunately, some have made hurtful comments. Fox News anchor, Shepherd Smith gave his own unhelpful perspective of the nature of suicide:

“One of the children he so loved, one of the children grieving tonight. Because their father killed himself in a fit of depression… You could love three little things so much, watch them grow, they’re in their mid-20s, and they’re inspiring you… And yet, something inside you is so horrible or you’re such a coward or whatever the reason that you decide that you have to end it. Robin Williams, at 63, did that today.

Leadership

The case for the 45 credit seminary degree

The Atlantic ran a disturbing article on the state of middle class clergy carrying a seminary degree: high debt, low wages, vanishing churches, and part-time pastor positions. The piece profiles Justin Barringer, a recent seminary grad who like many before him graduated the call to pastoral ministry. His story is not unlike thousands of other ministers:

Justin Barringer would seem to have the perfect résumé. He’s a seminary grad, an author and book editor, and a former missionary to China and Greece. But despite applying to nearly a hundred jobs over the course of two years, Barringer, who lives in Lexington, Kentucky, could not secure a full-time, salaried church position.

So he splits his time among three jobs, working as a freelance editor, an employee at a nonprofit for the homeless, and a part-time assistant pastor at a United Methodist Church. “I am not mad at the church,” Barringer says. “However, I wish someone had advised me against taking on so much debt in order to be trained for ministry.”

Here is the reality: high debt and scarcity of full-time paying pastor positions.

The traditional mainline church track for full-time pastors followed like this: 4-years of college, 3-years of graduate seminary education, and ordination. This process launched a generation of pastors into their ministry in the 1950’s, 60’s, and 70’s. The traditional 90-credit seminary degree, the master of divinity, became the mark of an intellectual, professional, and full-time pastor. Churches had the people and money to support such a model. The pastor typical could raise a family and even buy a house (if one was not provided).

Now, because of cost of graduate education, seminary graduates are saddled with debt. In the $40,000 to $60,000 range (on top of college debt). The pace of the rise of the cost of education has exceeded the rate of inflation: to the tune of 500% since 1985. Usually, when a professional incurs such a debt, their boss gives them a raise because of their higher degree. Not the case with pastors. Many pastors have the same credit hours as school administrators, but paid much less.

With this current reality of shrinking churches, downsized church budgets, less full-time pastor positions, and need for a generation of clergy to lead churches into a new culture, a shorter more focused seminary degree is needed. An online distance modified 45-credit degree could shake up this bleak future for pastors and churches. Here’s what the 45-credit seminary degree could look like:

Christianity

Don’t fall for this scam

Scam, scam, scams. Internet scams are nothing new. You may have received a scam request for $1000 to be sent to some guy in Asia with a promise of a huge reward. These scams are getting more involved and more creative.

From time to time, I’m asked to speak at conferences, seminars, or denomination gatherings. It is not usual for me to receive an email about a speaking opportunity from someone I do not know. This morning, I received a rather usual email: A “invitation” to speak at an event in England.

Great, right? However, there were several red flags:

Poor wording/spelling/grammar I’m not a super self editor, but when you invite someone to speak, the invite is free of errors. They didn’t spell Baptist right. The email is riddled with errors.

Broken website If you click the website, the webpage is “frozen”. If there’s a conference, then there’s a website.

Use of CAPS No one uses capitalization in an email unless they are YELLING.

They want money No speaking conference is going to ask for money upfront. I learned that this scam is common and the next email is about money. This guy fell for it.

Use of Gmail If a large or small conference invites you, it’s not going to come from a Gmail, Hotmail, or Yahoo account. That’s bogus.

Bottom line, if anyone wants your identity information, passport information, or money – do not give it out! Below is the invite: Continue Reading…

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