Browsing Tag

Relationships

Albany Times Union, blog

Featured in Wedding Article

My good “in” with the Albany Times Union through my blog has produced several fruitful friendships. One them is Kristi Gustafson Barlette, social media strategist and staff writer, who writes about culture, trends, and relationships. Kristi interviewed me for an article on the benefits of premarital counseling for engaged couples:

Counseling. That one little word often conjures up images of trouble — either for you independently or as a couple. Many people believe turning to a counselor means you are weak or cannot handle life on your own. But, in reality, counseling — especially the premarital variety — can help you better understand yourself and your partner.

“Counselors are not just there to point out the things that are bad; they are also there for reinforcement and to point out what’s good,” says Amy Eisinger, an associate editor with WeddingChannel.com. “It’s not like you are going to discover this earth-shattering issue. Pre-wedding counseling is going to help you strengthen your relationship; it’s not going to break you up.”

Rev. Alan Rudnick, minister at the First Baptist Church in Ballston Spa, requires everyone he marries to go through premarital counseling. Couples meet with Rudnick three or four times before the wedding and take an in-depth look at their relationship. He is not a judge, and his church is not a drive-by wedding chapel. Instead, Rudnick establishes relationships with couples — and often with their parents, as well — that can last long after the duo slip bands on one another’s ring finger. “It lets us sit down and make the relationship qualitative, instead of quantitative,” Rudnick says.

Read the rest

Related articles

marriage

The Facebook & Marriage Problem

Is it permissible for a spouse to post pictures on Facebook that display flirting with shirtless men? What’s the big deal? It’s harmless, right?

That was a listener’s question on a local radio station which features email questions on relationships, marriage, or even popular culture. I tried to call in to this radio show and throw in my two cents: Ah, are you kidding? (lines were busy, thought I thought I’d post my response)

As a pastor, I often meet with couples in premarital counseling and martial counseling. Engaged couples often balk at the idea that their partner would never cheat on them. Married couples often seek counseling when things are at the worst point in their marriage. Sometimes, it’s too late. Other times, marriages can be repaired.

If you want to know why almost half of all marriages end in divorce in this country, look no further than the example of this listener’s Facebook question.

One of the radio hosts remarked, “What’s the big deal!?! It’s harmless.” Continue Reading…

Generation X, Generation Y, Millennials

Millennials value Parenting more than Marriage

A recent Pew Poll and study among 18-25 year-old adults found that parenting is more important than marriage. The majority of Millennials, (generally those born between 1982 and 1995) about 52%, said being a good parent is “one of the most important things” in life. About 30% said the same about having a successful marriage. This Pew Poll points out that there is a 22 percentage point gap in the way Millennials value parenthood over marriage.

Sometimes called “Generation Y”, Millennials differed from their Generation X counterparts:

When this same question was posed to 18- to 29-year-olds in 1997, the gap was just 7 percentage points. Back then, 42% of the members of what is known as Generation X said being a good parent was one of the most important things in life, while 35% said the same about having a successful marriage.

What does this mean?

Continue Reading…